...I think I'm actually starting to feel a little insulted, by the repetition.
[He doesn't sound insulted, though, just bemused. On the stove, the pasta is nearing a perfect al dente, and he fishes one of the noodles out of the pot on a fork in order to taste it.]
What part, exactly, is so unbelievable? Help me understand.
[Groaning impatiently at himself, Prompto turns away, rubbing furiously at his face like he can wipe the blush off. Or the stupidity, maybe.]
I'm not... I'm okay, I guess? But I'm not... special-looking, or anything. Definitely not in high school. And I didn't figure--look, even back then, all of you were stupid hot, you know? So there wasn't any reason to look at me. Well, except for doing my pre-best friendification background check or whatever. Crap, really lucky I passed that, in retrospect...
Ah, right, of course. Because it's ancient Insomnian law that certifiably hot people are only allowed to experience romantic interest in other certifiably hot people.
[Hmm. Another ninety seconds, maybe, on the al dente. Good, that should be just enough time to finish his thought before inevitably needing an excuse for an escape, after what he's about to say.]
...The thing I've always been most attracted to about Noct is his smile. When we were both young, seeing him smile made me feel good, and I wanted to protect that smile of his. Then, when I was older, I started to realize that it wasn't just that I liked his smile. It's that I liked the way it made me feel when he smiled at me.
[There it is — the perfect al dente. Now he's free to fuss with the pasta and not have to actually look at Prompto, up until he realizes that he has to drain the pasta, and for that he needs —
Shit. The colander.]
I don't recall the exact particulars. I...don't think I was made privy to them, actually. You had something on your phone, and you were fairly hanging off of his shoulder, and you were laughing at it. It made him laugh.
[...what if he finds a fork and just picks every piece of this pasta out of the pot SINGLE-HANDEDLY instead of needing the colander. WHAT IF.]
Perhaps, those times when you thought you weren't special, you were overlooking the things about yourself that are.
[Almost as involuntarily as a choice made in a dream, Prompto picks the colander back up and offers it to Ignis, looking at his hands instead of at him.]
So you liked me... because Noct liked me?
[He ventures the thought slowly. It doesn't really seem to encompass all the facts, but it's close enough to what he's always thought that, if Ignis agrees, this will all--well, it'll sort of make sense again.]
I liked that you made him happy. But you're attributing a bit too much cause and effect onto him, I think.
[Equally eyes-averted, he gratefully takes the colander and gets it set up, just in time to rescue his pasta before it loses its al dente and goes oversoft.]
To say "because" implies that my liking you was contingent on Noct liking you. Or, was the result of it. It's more that I liked you on your own merits, but Noct was the opportunity that created my exposure to it. If that makes sense.
...Were it not for my current kite-flying arrangement with Noctis, you would certainly be on my short list. Assuming, of course, you were both available and amenable.
[Sorry, Prompto's organs. It was nice knowing you.]
[Yeah, there goes his spleen or his pancreas or something. Surely he will be dead within the hour, if there's any justice in the world.]
But you are, so--I mean, with Noct. So that's. That.
[That seems to deliver him, like a drowning man fumbling halfway onto shore. At least that much still makes sense in the world. Noctis and Ignis are together, they belong together. Gravity still works. Prompto's hand is pressed so hard over his face, he might be worried the skin will jump off his cheekbones unassisted.]
Whoa. [He laughs dizzily.] That's so massively beyond flattering, I think my insides are gonna fall out.
['Controlled' maybe isn't the best descriptor for what Prompto is, though, as he shakes his head again, roasted face in his hands, and then holds up a finger.]
Seriously, though, what else could I even be, getting complimented like that by objectively the handsomest guy on the entire planet as we know it?
[He pauses, then sticks up a second finger and a third.]
Noct's the most beautiful, and Gladio's the smokin' sexiest. I figured that all out a while ago.
Well, just calling him the sexiest doesn't seem right. Right? I mean, say it in your head while you're picturing Gladio. Is he sexy, or is he smokin' sexy?
[And, lest Ignis not be properly imagining Mr. Amicitia:]
--Backseat of the car, looking at you over his book like he knows you're watching. Picture that Gladio.
Ah...well. I suppose that depends on what the list actually describes. "Available, amenable, and if I were unattached"?
[He pauses a minute, regarding the sink, which is abruptly highly interesting.]
There's a shorter list even than that. One that only you and Gladio are on, actually — the people who might stand a chance of understanding why you could only ever hold second place in my life, however much I might care for you.
[The sudden sting surprises more than hurts him, and Prompto blinks fast. Where did that come from? Of the three of them, it's usually Noct or Gladio--as much as he loves them both--that takes an accidental fly swatter to his feelings. It's so weird that it's Ignis, he can't even source the ouch at first.
Oh. Duh. 'Second place.' That'd hurt coming from anyone, the matter-of-fact confirmation of his place in their world, but it's Ignis, and...
And before he can even start to deflate, he remembers who, in Ignis's life, he'd be second to, and he fills right back up with warm agreement.]
Then I'm glad our kite strings shook out the way they did. You and Noct, I mean, and not any other way around.
[Bouncing lightly on his feet, Prompto scoots past Ignis and sets the butter for the pasta down by his hands.]
You're a first-place guy, Iggy, and you should get to love someone in a first place kind of way. A no-holds-barred, nitro-boosted, supersonic jet-fueled kind of way, with no brakes on! And no worrying about who's promised what part of your heart. That's what I think.
[On his way back to the cupboard, feeling even more deeply affectionate than usual, Prompto lands a quick, friendly smack on Ignis's impeccable posterior.]
You never half-ass anything, so of course you should love Noct with your whole ass, too!
[Honestly, Prompto would've gotten fullnamed here even without the boisterous slap to the ass, but that certainly didn't hurt in terms of provoking it from Ignis. Instinctively, he spins, mostly so that he can protect his posterior by shielding it against the counter, but also a little bit so that he can face Prompto more directly.]
...I do, you know. While those aren't precisely the words I would've chosen, I'll admit, the metaphor is still an apt one.
[A pause. A consideration. And then: ]
Though I suppose the city of Altissia might find them rather on-point.
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[He doesn't sound insulted, though, just bemused. On the stove, the pasta is nearing a perfect al dente, and he fishes one of the noodles out of the pot on a fork in order to taste it.]
What part, exactly, is so unbelievable? Help me understand.
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[Groaning impatiently at himself, Prompto turns away, rubbing furiously at his face like he can wipe the blush off. Or the stupidity, maybe.]
I'm not... I'm okay, I guess? But I'm not... special-looking, or anything. Definitely not in high school. And I didn't figure--look, even back then, all of you were stupid hot, you know? So there wasn't any reason to look at me. Well, except for doing my pre-best friendification background check or whatever. Crap, really lucky I passed that, in retrospect...
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[Hmm. Another ninety seconds, maybe, on the al dente. Good, that should be just enough time to finish his thought before inevitably needing an excuse for an escape, after what he's about to say.]
...The thing I've always been most attracted to about Noct is his smile. When we were both young, seeing him smile made me feel good, and I wanted to protect that smile of his. Then, when I was older, I started to realize that it wasn't just that I liked his smile. It's that I liked the way it made me feel when he smiled at me.
[He shrugs.]
Your smile was what I noticed, too.
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My--?
[He gapes at Ignis, wide-eyed and open-mouthed, forces his stare back down at the colander, but then looks up again.]
When? ...A-asking specifically this time.
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[There it is — the perfect al dente. Now he's free to fuss with the pasta and not have to actually look at Prompto, up until he realizes that he has to drain the pasta, and for that he needs —
Shit. The colander.]
I don't recall the exact particulars. I...don't think I was made privy to them, actually. You had something on your phone, and you were fairly hanging off of his shoulder, and you were laughing at it. It made him laugh.
[...what if he finds a fork and just picks every piece of this pasta out of the pot SINGLE-HANDEDLY instead of needing the colander. WHAT IF.]
Perhaps, those times when you thought you weren't special, you were overlooking the things about yourself that are.
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[Almost as involuntarily as a choice made in a dream, Prompto picks the colander back up and offers it to Ignis, looking at his hands instead of at him.]
So you liked me... because Noct liked me?
[He ventures the thought slowly. It doesn't really seem to encompass all the facts, but it's close enough to what he's always thought that, if Ignis agrees, this will all--well, it'll sort of make sense again.]
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[Equally eyes-averted, he gratefully takes the colander and gets it set up, just in time to rescue his pasta before it loses its al dente and goes oversoft.]
To say "because" implies that my liking you was contingent on Noct liking you. Or, was the result of it. It's more that I liked you on your own merits, but Noct was the opportunity that created my exposure to it. If that makes sense.
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[IT'S AS CLOSE AN APPROXIMATION OF WHAT'S BEEN SAID AS HE CAN GET OUT OF HIS MOUTH WITHOUT EXPIRING WHERE HE STANDS]
A-and you've talked about it with Noct?
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[...]
And I think both he and I are in general agreement that you're cute, yes.
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...In a kite-flying way.
[If Prompto blushes any harder, his organs are probably going to start failing from lack of blood going to non-face parts of his body.]
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[Sorry, Prompto's organs. It was nice knowing you.]
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But you are, so--I mean, with Noct. So that's. That.
[That seems to deliver him, like a drowning man fumbling halfway onto shore. At least that much still makes sense in the world. Noctis and Ignis are together, they belong together. Gravity still works. Prompto's hand is pressed so hard over his face, he might be worried the skin will jump off his cheekbones unassisted.]
Whoa. [He laughs dizzily.] That's so massively beyond flattering, I think my insides are gonna fall out.
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[...]
Or even pleasant, really. Kindly control your insides, Prompto.
[Is he kidding? Probably. Hopefully.]
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['Controlled' maybe isn't the best descriptor for what Prompto is, though, as he shakes his head again, roasted face in his hands, and then holds up a finger.]
Seriously, though, what else could I even be, getting complimented like that by objectively the handsomest guy on the entire planet as we know it?
[He pauses, then sticks up a second finger and a third.]
Noct's the most beautiful, and Gladio's the smokin' sexiest. I figured that all out a while ago.
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[Ranking himself as the handsomest is a little bit of a stretch, however, and — wait a minute.]
I'm sorry, the smokin' sexiest? Is that a technical term?
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[And, lest Ignis not be properly imagining Mr. Amicitia:]
--Backseat of the car, looking at you over his book like he knows you're watching. Picture that Gladio.
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I can't possibly be watching, I am keeping my eyes on the road ahead of us as proper driver safety would require.
[Translation: oh, he's imagining it, all right.]
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[He pulls back from that meaningful tone, though, and asks innocently:]
So is Gladio on the short list, too?
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[He pauses a minute, regarding the sink, which is abruptly highly interesting.]
There's a shorter list even than that. One that only you and Gladio are on, actually — the people who might stand a chance of understanding why you could only ever hold second place in my life, however much I might care for you.
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Oh. Duh. 'Second place.' That'd hurt coming from anyone, the matter-of-fact confirmation of his place in their world, but it's Ignis, and...
And before he can even start to deflate, he remembers who, in Ignis's life, he'd be second to, and he fills right back up with warm agreement.]
Then I'm glad our kite strings shook out the way they did. You and Noct, I mean, and not any other way around.
[Bouncing lightly on his feet, Prompto scoots past Ignis and sets the butter for the pasta down by his hands.]
You're a first-place guy, Iggy, and you should get to love someone in a first place kind of way. A no-holds-barred, nitro-boosted, supersonic jet-fueled kind of way, with no brakes on! And no worrying about who's promised what part of your heart. That's what I think.
[On his way back to the cupboard, feeling even more deeply affectionate than usual, Prompto lands a quick, friendly smack on Ignis's impeccable posterior.]
You never half-ass anything, so of course you should love Noct with your whole ass, too!
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[Honestly, Prompto would've gotten fullnamed here even without the boisterous slap to the ass, but that certainly didn't hurt in terms of provoking it from Ignis. Instinctively, he spins, mostly so that he can protect his posterior by shielding it against the counter, but also a little bit so that he can face Prompto more directly.]
...I do, you know. While those aren't precisely the words I would've chosen, I'll admit, the metaphor is still an apt one.
[A pause. A consideration. And then: ]
Though I suppose the city of Altissia might find them rather on-point.
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[...
!]
Oh, you meant the other part. For a second, I thought you were saying you took back Altissia with the power of your ass!
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[THANKS, PROMPTO, HE'S BRIGHT RED NOW.]
Why is that the assumption you immediately leapt to?!
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Well, I still don't know how you did it all by yourself like that!
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[The sad thing is he means this in complete seriousness and has no idea how absurdly funny it sounds out of context.]
The rest of it, one thing just...led to another, I suppose.
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