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[ all mutant animals seem to have extra legs and maybe it's a centipede spider woman, alex, u don't know
but yeah they're at least probably gonna bleed her to death if nothing else. go team whatever the fuck! ]
Peachy! [ it's said around a cough though so that's #convincing. this time he...stabs his sword through the back of her. kimono? is this a yukata? what's the fucking difference dave isn't enough of a weeb to know.
but he does that to hold her the fuck in place while ignis does the pike thing. ]
but yeah they're at least probably gonna bleed her to death if nothing else. go team whatever the fuck! ]
Peachy! [ it's said around a cough though so that's #convincing. this time he...stabs his sword through the back of her. kimono? is this a yukata? what's the fucking difference dave isn't enough of a weeb to know.
but he does that to hold her the fuck in place while ignis does the pike thing. ]
[So impaling her, evidently, is what they're doing today, and presumably as soon as the spider woman figures that out she's going to immediately try to cut her losses and escape; if they're going to kill her, they'll have to make sure she can't succeed at that.
So Dave's sword goes through the back of her, and Ignis's spear goes through the front of her, and it's a good thing that nobody is around to make Freudian color commentary because the fact of the matter is, getting impaled on two different fronts is a pretty surefire way to ensure that you're going to die, regardless of what else might happen.
Seems she's already losing a lot of blood, from this, and her attacks in response are turning sluggish and slow. If this were a game of Mortal Kombat, someone would almost assuredly be yelling FINISH HER right about now.]
So Dave's sword goes through the back of her, and Ignis's spear goes through the front of her, and it's a good thing that nobody is around to make Freudian color commentary because the fact of the matter is, getting impaled on two different fronts is a pretty surefire way to ensure that you're going to die, regardless of what else might happen.
Seems she's already losing a lot of blood, from this, and her attacks in response are turning sluggish and slow. If this were a game of Mortal Kombat, someone would almost assuredly be yelling FINISH HER right about now.]
Something... about my dad. And Insomnia.
[ Noctis begins hesitantly. Already the contents of the dream is slipping from him, leaving him with a strange, hollow melancholy he can't quite shake. He stays in Ignis' arms, pressed up against him and sighs. His promise is something he draws comfort from, but more than that, more than all of it -- is Noctis' desire to protect him, them.
I will always be with you. ]
You...? You were awake before I was.
[ Noctis begins hesitantly. Already the contents of the dream is slipping from him, leaving him with a strange, hollow melancholy he can't quite shake. He stays in Ignis' arms, pressed up against him and sighs. His promise is something he draws comfort from, but more than that, more than all of it -- is Noctis' desire to protect him, them.
I will always be with you. ]
You...? You were awake before I was.
[ it's...
sickeningly reminiscent of how he died, actually. there's something wry and sympathetic to the twist of dave's mouth as he draws his sword back out and makes certain his next strike is more lethal.
dirk mentioned decapitation and maybe it's on the brain or maybe it's a strider thing but that's what he does, some weird combination of competent and merciful in a way that absolutely isn't by the standard definition of the word. ]
sickeningly reminiscent of how he died, actually. there's something wry and sympathetic to the twist of dave's mouth as he draws his sword back out and makes certain his next strike is more lethal.
dirk mentioned decapitation and maybe it's on the brain or maybe it's a strider thing but that's what he does, some weird combination of competent and merciful in a way that absolutely isn't by the standard definition of the word. ]
[OFF WITH HER HEAD.
Just like that, the body goes limp where it's still stuck on the end of Ignis's pike, its remaining connected limbs twitching as the now-headless creature undergoes its death rattles and eventually falls still.
Mercifully, for everyone concerned, there is no way Ignis is going to look at this corpse and come up with a NEW RECIPEH. Because holy shit.]
...Seems that did it, Dave.
[He's a little out of breath, but ultimately no worse for the wear.]
Just like that, the body goes limp where it's still stuck on the end of Ignis's pike, its remaining connected limbs twitching as the now-headless creature undergoes its death rattles and eventually falls still.
Mercifully, for everyone concerned, there is no way Ignis is going to look at this corpse and come up with a NEW RECIPEH. Because holy shit.]
...Seems that did it, Dave.
[He's a little out of breath, but ultimately no worse for the wear.]
[ please come up with a NEW RECIPEH in dave's vicinity someday so he can go lmao what though.
but yeah. he looks at the very dead spider lady and then -
goes to the webs to continue cutting free what animals are still alive. ]
At least decapitation still works the same. How many weapons do you have on you, anyway?
but yeah. he looks at the very dead spider lady and then -
goes to the webs to continue cutting free what animals are still alive. ]
At least decapitation still works the same. How many weapons do you have on you, anyway?
I believe you've seen them all, actually. Spelldaggers and the lance.
[Speaking of which, let's just shove the lance back into the armiger, shall we. Hammerspace!]
I keep them in the same place I kept that can of soda I used when we were baking together. It's something of an all-purpose holding mechanism, the armiger.
[He pauses, seeming to consider something, and then goes over to retrieve both his spelldaggers before heading over to try to help Dave in his efforts.]
I seem to recall I was a bit duplicitous about that as well, at the time. It's Noct's magic, that I have access to. I've been able to use it for years now.
[Speaking of which, let's just shove the lance back into the armiger, shall we. Hammerspace!]
I keep them in the same place I kept that can of soda I used when we were baking together. It's something of an all-purpose holding mechanism, the armiger.
[He pauses, seeming to consider something, and then goes over to retrieve both his spelldaggers before heading over to try to help Dave in his efforts.]
I seem to recall I was a bit duplicitous about that as well, at the time. It's Noct's magic, that I have access to. I've been able to use it for years now.
Among other things, yes. He's my superior when he chooses to be.
[Obligingly, he knifes free something that is probably a possum, if you look at it with a little bit of imagination.]
Sometimes he doesn't. Oftentimes he doesn't, actually.
[Obligingly, he knifes free something that is probably a possum, if you look at it with a little bit of imagination.]
Sometimes he doesn't. Oftentimes he doesn't, actually.
Indeed. Though sometimes that makes it all the more difficult, in the moments when they have to be your leader, and not your friend.
[Or your father, he thinks idly.]
Sometimes it's hard to embrace that.
[Or your father, he thinks idly.]
Sometimes it's hard to embrace that.
I suspect you'd be better at it than you might think. Provided that no one told you that leading was what you were doing, that is.
[He shrugs slightly.]
If caring about the welfare of people is one of the fundamental criteria of it, you're already far out ahead of the figurative curve.
[He shrugs slightly.]
If caring about the welfare of people is one of the fundamental criteria of it, you're already far out ahead of the figurative curve.
At what, caring about the welfare of others?
["The other guy", huh. That'll come back later, he's making a note, but for right now he'll let the conversation continue to flow this way instead.]
Not at all. But my skillset isn't designed for leadership, per se. I suppose you could say I lack the one fundamental characteristic that any good leader needs.
["The other guy", huh. That'll come back later, he's making a note, but for right now he'll let the conversation continue to flow this way instead.]
Not at all. But my skillset isn't designed for leadership, per se. I suppose you could say I lack the one fundamental characteristic that any good leader needs.
No, but that's an admirable guess.
[He regards his daggers, then lets them shatter away back into the armiger to rejoin his lance.]
Choosing the right path to walk. My bailiwick is seeing as many of the paths as possible, and being able to identify the strengths and weaknesses of each one. My weakness is that sometimes the right answer isn't one that can be determined by a mere cost/benefit analysis.
[He regards his daggers, then lets them shatter away back into the armiger to rejoin his lance.]
Choosing the right path to walk. My bailiwick is seeing as many of the paths as possible, and being able to identify the strengths and weaknesses of each one. My weakness is that sometimes the right answer isn't one that can be determined by a mere cost/benefit analysis.
Oh. God, I'm way the fuck not any better at that. [ knowing what has to happen is an entirely different ballpark. ] But yeah. Sometimes the right path isn't the one that seems the most logical, but "hey, we need to do this because it's what we should do, as decent people, and maybe that won't go great for us but we're doing it anyway" and the sometimes it works out and naivety wins the day and sometimes it doesn't. And sometimes there aren't really any "right" answers but just a bunch of bad ones and the logic might help to figure out which is the least bad overall?
[ He's heard about this guy on the grapevine. It feels like it's been so long since he's had anything like a decent meal, and something actually cooked sounds divine. While Josuke isn't shameless enough to mooch off of people who might actually be nice (he cares a lot less if those people are assholes), perhaps he'll have something to offer in exchange for the food. ]
Hey. Is this Mr. Ignis? [ making an effort to sound polite ]
Hey. Is this Mr. Ignis? [ making an effort to sound polite ]
Yeah. My name's Josuke. Josuke Higashikata.
I heard you were the go-to guy for some decent food. Not meaning to sound like a mooch here [ but totally sounding like one. ] but I haven't had a good meal all week. That's ... kinda why I'm ringing you up.
I heard you were the go-to guy for some decent food. Not meaning to sound like a mooch here [ but totally sounding like one. ] but I haven't had a good meal all week. That's ... kinda why I'm ringing you up.
Really. I'm flattered my reputation precedes me, then.
May I ask how old you are, Josuke?
May I ask how old you are, Josuke?
Professional curiosity. I would've prepared you something either way, but you could say I have something of a soft spot in particular for ensuring that the teenagers here don't go without a proper meal.
[ so nice ... the mom friend. ]
That's really kind of you, Mr. Ignis. [ and he's somehow not used to this. most people in JJBA are weird, abnormal assholes. ]
But I couldn't take your food for free. My pride won't allow me to mooch off someone so nice. I'll do you a favour in return, how about that?
That's really kind of you, Mr. Ignis. [ and he's somehow not used to this. most people in JJBA are weird, abnormal assholes. ]
But I couldn't take your food for free. My pride won't allow me to mooch off someone so nice. I'll do you a favour in return, how about that?
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